You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
