WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
