Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize