Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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