tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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