just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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