There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
it hurts more in the daytime
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
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the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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