I'm lost and stupid without you.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
