She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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