...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
