i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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