I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize