Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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