The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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