I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
