READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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