you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
