Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
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