mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
