Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
