she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
