it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
