I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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