hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
