I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize