hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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