so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
