Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on