I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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