I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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