I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
