On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize