I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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