forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
