worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
