All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
