I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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