i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
My boob is missing a layer of skin
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
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