She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize