I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize