We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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