Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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