I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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