There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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