I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
