Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted.. http://tfl.nu/j3e7
  Replies (57) Good night (1095) Bad night (16160)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Fat chicks shouldn't bartend

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): Fat chicks shouldn't bartend http://tfl.nu/r18g
  Replies (245) Good night (978) Bad night (3654)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey http://tfl.nu/owfj
  Replies (45) Good night (711) Bad night (2597)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started http://tfl.nu/zumk
  Replies (54) Good night (7119) Bad night (2150)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck. http://tfl.nu/534s
  Replies (10) Good night (5613) Bad night (1013)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night... http://tfl.nu/vdnw
  Replies (11) Good night (2925) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos http://tfl.nu/qrbd
  Replies (11) Good night (4747) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget. http://tfl.nu/qqak
  Replies (9) Good night (512) Bad night (1614)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues. http://tfl.nu/jvdq
  Replies (7) Good night (758) Bad night (1395)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies http://tfl.nu/shv8
  Replies (7) Good night (1520) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today http://tfl.nu/l6jz
  Replies (2) Good night (1187) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot. http://tfl.nu/caxg
  Replies (3) Good night (831) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes. http://tfl.nu/i72f
  Replies (7) Good night (1931) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff. http://tfl.nu/snvk
  Replies (8) Good night (1428) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars http://tfl.nu/0i0u
  Replies (0) Good night (600) Bad night (340)

Randomize