so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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