we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Randomize
