Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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