I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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