she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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